Good Friends

Yesterday I was reminded once again of how many wonderful friends I have surrounding me. I am especially grateful for the wonderful men in my life. Sometimes I feel like men are under-appreciated because we just expect them to be good and strong and all of these other wonderful qualities, but then don't praise them when they are. This post is for them; to let them know that they are appreciated and that I see their goodness and strength every day. 

As an example I'll share a story. Yesterday, I took a test for one of my classes and although I won't know my grade for another week or so I felt like I did really badly. I left the testing center struggling not to cry, and started home. On my way down the stairs at the back of the hill I tripped, and fell a couple of steps hurting my already hurt foot even more. (I hurt my foot dancing on Tuesday and it had just been starting to feel better.) It was a case of adding injury to insult. I really wanted to cry, but I didn't want to cry in public, and I didn't want to go home and have to talk to my roommates about it. My automatic response was to turn to my guy friends. There is an apartment of guys in my ward (you know who you are) who I consider really good friends and who I am comfortable with. Instead of going home I went straight to their apartment, in the middle of the day, hoping someone would be home. I knocked on the door, and someone yelled "It's open." As I walked in I started to talk fairly quickly, and I'm sure almost incoherently. "Can I have a tissue, and sit on your couch, and will you please just ignore me." He responded in the affirmative and handed me some toilet paper. As I sat on his couch still inexplicably trying not to cry he asked me if I really wanted him to ignore me. I said I didn't know, and soon the whole story spilled out of me. I ended by telling him how silly I felt for wanting to cry about all of this. To my surprise he told me he thought crying was a really good idea. So I did. I put my head down in the arm of the couch, curled up in a ball, and sobbed for at least five minutes. Then my friend came and sat down next to me, leaned over and put his arm around me and told me it would be okay. He told me I wasn't silly for being upset, and that it would feel better in a little bit. Eventually I stopped crying and sat up, and we ended up talking for a couple of hours about various things. When I left for home I felt so much better, and was so grateful that I had someone I could turn to when I was distressed who would comfort me. My friend probably didn't know, but I'm a pretty touchy person. That doesn't come out a lot now because most of my friend aren't touch, so I try to respect their space, but physical contact is really important to me. The fastest way to calm me down or make me feel better is to hug me. The sense of relief, safety, and caring that physical contact brings to me is something that I don't feel very often any more, and having him offer that when I was distressed really meant a lot.

That was a rather long story to illustrate a rather simple point. I have a lot of wonderful men in my life. I am so grateful for them. Really, I just want them to know how great they are. I want them to know that I recognize all of the things that make them good men even if the world in general doesn't. They are strong and compassionate and smart and funny. They are gentlemen who know how to treat ladies, but also boys who know how to tease girls. I am grateful to have them in my life, and I hope that they never forget that.